Prince William

With every major royal wedding comes a major amount of royal wedding memorabilia. Walking through Covent Garden this weekend I was stunned at the mounting slew of dishes, key chains, bar rags, beer mugs and other trinkets featuring the faces of the royal couple, usually looking like stiff, lifeless caricatures of themselves, and bearing the all important date: April 29th, 2011. Like we were in danger of forgetting.

Reading back over my last few posts, it just occurred to me that I’ve managed to fall into a very common trap when it comes to talking about weddings, which is: It’s been all about the bride.

The Daily Mirror, one of London’s more entertaining tabloids, recently reported that the Palace has issued a corporate dictum literally begging UK companies to stop sending free samples of everything from linens and decorations to footwear and fashion accessories in the hope of having their product incorporated into the royal wedding plans.

The Palace has disallowed production of official Will and Kate tea towels as part of the royal wedding paraphernalia, on the grounds that they’re too disposable and kitschy. This saddens and slightly offends me, since I collect souvenir tea towels (the tackier the better) and am, by extension, a great fan of kitsch.

When the royal nuptials take place on April 29th, the Queen won’t be losing a son, she’ll be gaining a daughter – and a loyal servant for life.