On pornography
Dear Wise Guys:
The other night I found my significant other looking at pornography on the Internet - AGAIN! The first time I caught him, he swore it didn't mean a thing and promised that if it bothered me that much, he would stop. I thought we had a great sex life, but now I'm not so sure. He insists it's just a "guy thing" that has nothing to do with his feelings for me. I don't believe him. What should I do?
Patrick, brother of two sisters, says:
This comes as a shock to most women, but the sad fact is, guys watch porn. All guys. Your dad, your husband, uh, er, even your brother. Your guy still loves you and finds you sexy, it's just that porn is to guys what a 'chick flick' is to gals – cheap, dirty, and oh-so-wonderfully unrealistic. If you deny him this guilty pleasure you may be setting yourself up for disappointment.
Dave, a happily married husband, says:
Porn is too easy to find and we're fascinated by it because, deep down, we're still fifteen. What should worry you more is that your guy looks at it when you're around and then lies to you about it. When you bring up this issue again, try framing your concerns around broken trust. If that doesn't work, let him catch you looking at better-endowed men online. That'll snap him back into line – fast.
Bruce, a pal to countless gals, says:
Given what little Sex Ed guys receive – most think Kama Sutra is a dish best paired with a mango smoothie – many rely on porn for new moves with which to impress you. So, why not join his online adventures? Suggest watching some guy-on-guy action, which some gals prefer to straight porn. You'll either have a sexy new hobby to share, or he'll be so aghast you'll never worry about him surfing for smut again.
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