Advertisement
  • Newsletter
  • Subscribe
Living

4 Life Lessons In 120 Seconds, Courtesy Of Michelle Obama

That's one lesson every 30 seconds! The former first lady tackles fear of failure, imposter syndrome and suffering fools in one fell swoop.
PHILADELPHIA, PA - OCTOBER 03: Former First Lady of the United States Michelle Obama and Screenwriter, director and producer Shonda Rhimes speak on stage during Pennsylvania Conference For Women 2017 at Pennsylvania Convention Center on October 3, 2017 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. (Photo by Marla Aufmuth/Getty Images for Pennsylvania Conference for Women) Photo, Marla Aufmuth/Getty Images for Pennsylvania Conference for Women.

The Pennsylvania Conference for Women is a deceivingly boring name for an event, considering it hosted former first lady Michelle Obama in one of her few public appearances since leaving the White House. Not only did the 12,000 people in the audience get to be in the presence of one of the most brilliant, hard-working and stylish first ladies ever (#Michelle4prez) on Tuesday, they got to witness a candid conversation between her and TV showrunner/mogul/game-changer Shonda Rhimes.

While Obama snuck in a few political burns, including taking a swipe at the current administration's "standard of ethics," the conversation mostly focused on encouraging women to drive change at work and in government. This two-minute clip of Obama talking about the consequences of fear of failure is chock-full of wisdom. Hopefully a full transcript of the entire convo will circulate soon.

Here's what we learned:

Advertisement

Some people are not allowed to fail

When asked about whether women have fewer chances to fail before being labeled "a failure," she responded: "I think that's true for women, for minorities. I think the bars are different, we experienced that over the last eight years. I joked on the campaign trail the bar kept moving."


Subscribe To Our Daily Newsletters — You'll Thank Us In The Morning
Subscribe To Our Daily Newsletters — You'll Thank Us In The Morning

Imposter syndrome benefits . . . imposters

Advertisement

“I want you all to pay attention, because this is what happens when we don’t stand up: We give our seats up to somebody who is 'supposed to be there' because of the stereotypes of what power and success looks like," she said. "I've seen imposters at a lot of tables, and when you're at the table and you realize, 'Oh, you are a fool' . . . and I'm worried about raising my hand?'"

We have to speak up to drown the fools out 

“I’ve been at so many tables and met so many fools who were imposters, but shame on us if we sit by and let an imposter talk us down. When you know what’s right and then you don’t say anything . . . you see wrong happening and you sit by quietly because you're afraid to fail — that’s what I want to challenge us, as women, [to] — speak up . . . We don’t get to the right answers without [raising] our voices.”

You can totally burn somebody without mentioning their name

Advertisement

As some pointed out on Twitter, there was no question which president was being referenced in all the talk about imposters and fools, but no names were mentioned (a feat Obama has pulled off before.)

The very best of Chatelaine straight to your inbox.

By signing up, you agree to our terms of use and privacy policy. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Sadiya Ansari is the author of In Exile: Rapture, Reunion, and My Grandmother’s Secret Life.

Advertisement
Advertisement
Copy link
The cover of Chatelaine magazine's spring 2025 issue, reading "weekend prep made easy"; "five delicious weeknight meals", "plus, why you'll never regret buying an air fryer"; "save money, stay stylish how to build a capsule wardrobe" and "home organization special" along with photos of burritos, chicken and rice and white bean soup, quick paella in a dutch oven, almost-instant Thai chicken curry and chicken broccoli casserole in an enamelled cast-iron skillet

Subscribe to Chatelaine!

Want to streamline your life? In our Spring 2025 issue, we’ll show you how—whether it’s paring down your wardrobe, decluttering your messiest spaces or spending way less time cooking thanks to an easy, mostly make-ahead meal plan for busy weeknights. Plus, our first annual Pantry Awards.